Saturday, January 17, 2009


OK I'm new to this whole new "technology" I think that should be the theme of this blog or something
that people who don't know how to use technology should just not try and go farm our food so we can eat and laugh as we watch them.
So now I have to introduce some structure in here to make the insane ramblings merely UNDERSTANDABLE insane ramblings.
Come on people just grow a second brain so you can understand me!
First part will be devoted to the characters or any traits I noticed about them.
Then what Happens or i.e plot
then we go Budget/animation/special effects.
finially we go to the main things I hated utterly, if not whole movie.
Then if any the good points.
Ok lets do this shindig. Pip pop
Zim zam?

TRANSMORPHERS (the brothers from another mother)
its a haze really when you watch to many B movies will basicly eat away at your brain until every single thing and character of the story is merely some tool of movie deleverance for added dynamic
I HATE dynamics
OH WOW your so ethnic! You have some dang multiculral stuff to look good to e veryone when in fact your just degrading them further.
Yea the asian guy has short spiky hair, loves video games and is a techy.
Yea the blonde dosen't really want to love but does in fact have a boner for the hero.
Yea the hero is a robot
Yea there's a sex scene

ok so in the future *I never tire of saying that, its like saying "IN THE NAME OF SCIENCE!"*
robots (not your normal type hevens no!) but the kind that can turn into a tank into... a robot tank!
seriously weres the plot element there besides to be a crappy knock off of transformers (wait you mean thats WHY it was made?! God god)
They humans live underground like the Matric failers they are and much like how the matric fails so does this movie.
Smart robots just own! I mean People haven't figured out that robots are just better humans of doom with guns that can't die.
Anyways it turns out there's hope for our humans, they find the super awesome main computer of the robots *yea they all have that one* and they have a chance to blow it up
The robots go full out
the humans go full out
the hero flies with his friendy friends and eh goes to the base place of doom on their flying mopeds and his friends defend him as he finds out he's a robot and must use his skillage as a robot to blow it up.
Oh and that skillage is basicly is that he was made to be a bomb
and that it was all planned
And mo-peds should really only be used for ground travel.

ok now b movies have a bad budget
normally its some losers with their friends who are rich or have a fancy cameria or to hopped up on drugs to give a damn
but this
and this is me here
mister dont care
I mean ok yea it was bad, really really bad, they some how managed to waste some sum of money on this crap
But still
STILL this gives no excuse for the following
not having gun flashes?! Or having sounds match the gun flashes?! PLEASE PLEASE JUST KILL THEM ALL ROBOTS!
wait nooo we also have the crapy green screen we see when a person is driving a car and they decided not to actually show the backround so just have other filmed in back part as they drive their crappy ass mop-ed flyers while being chased by "VOOM"ing noises.
"Chaptin its coming closer, I don't think I can make it!"
yea you got it.

that gun thing just threw me off,
but it started before that
there were the rooms that were 5x5 and the only ten actors and other stupid moments
I mean I guess its sorta showing that they're all living underground like hermits
but that doesn't mean your hermits in your grandma's basement
(oh wait YOU ARE?!)

I didnt


  1. HAHA. But that doesn't mean your hermits in your mother's basement. Oh wait, you are!

    Yeah, that's right. I just rewrote that shit.

  2. dude but being in your grandma's basement is so much more loserish
    It means your mom's dead to.
    You'd have to be a pretty sad man.