Wednesday, March 25, 2009

No remorse for Bums.

Like seriously I need to update more its just I'm one of those people who needs love and comments like the sociopath bastard I am. Er so yea each comment makes me want to post more etc etc.

THE SCREAMERS (The Hunting) *The Punning*

So once again we turn to Sci-fi for the majority of our B movie material and this movie brings its wares like its the end of the world; so desperate to fill each and every niche of diverse flavor.


We have Hot Chick with tank top: Nameless due to some random language the director had decided to use to make all the names of these complexly FLAT characters.

Viking Guy: who I can or would ever understand throughout the movie *Its the future whats some bearded Celtic doing here?*

Black Soldier: aka the token black; quite sad really because he had no reason to die

Rebel Soldier: I.E actually love interest; I was actually surprised, he managed to be pretty evil at first and then later still slip into the hero's pants.

Commander: Who I thought originally was going to be the love interest but actually turned out to fit the "greedy bastard willing to sell doomsday plans for money" stereotype; and yes there IS a stereotype like that.

Normal Trooper: who was last to die despite character flaws shown early on; and also filling the role of horny bastard usually one of the third characters to be killed of.
(it all comes down to priorities honestly.)

Daniel: The one guy who I could remember his name; and fits the lovable carer giver only to have his hope an care get wasted on some robot things that kill him due to the fact of being emotionless robot things. (Sorry; your empathy is lost on them Daniel.)


So There are two planets and one being Sirius 6B *remember my policy of fitting in as many unnecessary letters into names? YEA!*
Sirius 6B was thought to have no survivors from a scientist revolution using robots to kill everyone on the planet who was there. These robots deactivated due to how they were programed (constantly stated by the Techie so we all know that they are in fact; not dead ALIVE because going against whatever the most knowledgeable in the field is always a must in sci-fi.)
They get a message from the planet this team goes to get survivors.
Oh and the planet will blow in six days
Oh and this is conveniently mentioned by subtitles every time a day goes by.
SO yea robots = Not dead and also evolve a lot says rebel people the people from earth fight for a brief moment due to rebels thinking they may be robots.
The guys from earth accidentally release some of the captured robots mistaking them for people.
Lotz o death.
Have to get power for ship and finishes finally when killing the person who made the screamers who doesn't want them to leave saying that the screamers are a "plague" yata yata.
He also kills the commander who was going to sell the Screamers technology on earth. MONEY!

The ending is wonderful though; we have only the chick left and the rebel guy left and they go into sleep pods so they can wake up two months later near earth.
When the main le chick wakes up she finds out shes pregnant *she had sex during the six days with rebel)
She comments to the rebel that its to big of a baby for the month.

He's a SCREAMER! *gotta!* yea the baby grew fast apparently cus that's how robot babies work.
so now the main question is, is there a sequel?


I was generally surprised but the good *relatively* animation and clean scenes of excessive blood. I thought it was pretty nice to see a B movie finally that though had some bad animation could at lest make it "seem" good, I mean its all in the fine details people.
There was lots of death which I enjoy as well as splitting of limbs and electricity guns.


Despite my like for this movie there were some flaws.
All the normal screamers were burrowing machines.
think about it.
I sorta thought about it and as far as self evolving machines go something that pops out of the ground doesn't really strike me as something that is the destroyer of cities and worlds.
I mean if your hiding in a locked room how is it going to get in? It can only burrow though the ground not though buildings.
True they had Human/robot screamer things but still...

There were also some very clear misuse of characters like said token black character; seriously he had no reason to die; he gives the Techie this thing that everyone wears to not be seen by screamers and RIGHT
and now I mean RIGHT
gets killed by screamers.
...Why? Its not furthering plot nor is it really saying much about the movie.


I gotta admit that the whole "He was actually a Screamer" twist though not at all original made me a tad happy at heart; I think this steams from me sorta wanting to see the world burn from some idiots decision to have sex with a dude on another planet who licked blood from knifes and didn't sleep.
If it didn't work for ROMEO and JULIET it wont work in the six days of Sirius 6B blowing up.